via (sophie cuvelier)

waiting. waiting. waiting.

I try to stay distracted. To focus on anything and everything else. But it is simply unavoidable.

Maybe I am. I'm sure I'm not. What are we going to do next? Maybe there won't be a next. When should we start thinking about adoption? Domestic? International? Maybe I am. I'm sure I'm not.

over and over. around and around.

It's enough to drive someone crazy. It might be driving me crazy.

I don't know why some cycles are so much harder than others.

This one is brutal.


  1. It is so hard when you're going through it, but please know that when you're holding your child, however he or she might arrive, it is worth everything you've had to endure. We struggled to get pregnant also and it's so hard to imagine being on the other side, but you will get there. For me, three rounds of chlomid did it, but I have friends who have done IUI and who have adopted... in the end the "how" of becoming a mom truly doesn't mean a thing. Being a mom does. Hoping for a positive outcome for you soon!!

  2. The little ounce of hope that 'maybe this time will be the one' is what makes this whole thing so incredibly hard. Hang in there.

  3. The waiting game is brutal. I hope you get a way out of the nasty cycle very soon.

  4. I have been there so many times, and it is true when you say some months are more difficult than others. Thinking of you.

  5. Hang on! It is a struggle to think about anything else, I know. And it DOES make you crazy, especially when you are SURE that things will turn out a certain way. But hold onto that little bit of hope that it might turn out the way you want. Don't count yourself out yet.