10.21.2009

reprieve

via (Lina)
I got a call from my nurse

my number is *beautiful*

more than doubled

suprisingly, a sense of relief did not wash over me.

Just a feeling of *for now*

Because as long as I continue to see spotting

this feeling pulling at my heart will not leave

it could so easily all go away.

I truly appreciate all of your comments, prayers and good thoughts. They mean so much to me.
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24 comments:

  1. KristenOctober 21, 2009 at 2:01 PM

    Hooray for the excellent news! And what a great picture to match :)

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  2. MelissaOctober 21, 2009 at 2:51 PM

    Good news!!

    I do hope the spotting stops completely.

    Best wishes.

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  3. ericaOctober 21, 2009 at 3:01 PM

    love that squishy baby tush!

    i am glad that the numbers are good, but i know what you mean about remaining cautious. i'm like this in my everyday life, and i don't even have as good of a reason as you to feel that way! just naturally anxious and cautiously pessimistic, i guess.

    i hope this bean sticks and come summer, everything will turn out right.

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  4. anabela / fieldguidedOctober 21, 2009 at 3:03 PM

    I love that picture. I am cheering for you.

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  5. KateOctober 21, 2009 at 3:06 PM

    Wonderful news! I am still thinking good thoughts and praying for you. Hang in little bean--stick, stick!

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  6. ALOctober 21, 2009 at 5:51 PM

    Good news! I hope spotting stops very soon. Hang in there.

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  7. AnonymousOctober 21, 2009 at 6:34 PM

    Great news!

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  8. HillaryOctober 21, 2009 at 7:27 PM

    Whew! Great news. I hope the spotting STOPS ASAP!

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  9. APlusBOctober 21, 2009 at 7:38 PM

    Wonderful news about the beta! Hope that spotting stops for good now! Beautiful photo, as always.

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  10. AnonymousOctober 21, 2009 at 9:47 PM

    I know the feeling of fear. You want this so badly and you don't want anything to get in your way. I know spotting is scary but it is very common and hopefully this is just one of those "common" things. Focus on your beta numbers. They are strong and they continue to grow which is the important thing. Hang in there. In some ways I've been living my life in fear everyday that I'm going to lose it, but I keep reminding myself to try my best to remember what we have been given (you're pregnant!) and try to embrace and enjoy it as much as you can. Hugs. oh. and the mouse is adorable.

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  11. Suzy, Not a Fertile MyrtleOctober 22, 2009 at 10:32 AM

    Thanks for stopping by my blog. Sending lots of positive thoughts your way! Yay for that number going up and up.

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  12. tireegal68October 22, 2009 at 11:27 AM

    I am sending lots of hopeful strong beta no spotting vibes.
    I love your blog - the writing and the piccies! How do you get those pics? I love your new house- wow amazing! Just the kind of house I dream about! Great to meet you. Happy ICLW!

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  13. joraOctober 22, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    Sending you and the baby lots of love and happy, peaceful thoughts.

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  14. AnonymousOctober 22, 2009 at 5:31 PM

    that's wonderful news! i hope the spotting has already stopped. (hugs!)

    p.s. i love your blog. the photos add so much emotion to each post.

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  15. HeidiOctober 22, 2009 at 6:24 PM

    You are one brave woman. And I am wishing upon wish that this is one brave little bean. You can do it bean! You already have the cutest mouse ever!

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  16. KittyOctober 22, 2009 at 7:11 PM

    Hello from ICLW :)

    I hope the spotting stops soon, and you have a wonderful, uneventful pregnancy.

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  17. WifeyOctober 22, 2009 at 9:18 PM

    It's exciting that your numbers doubled! I hope your little bean continues to grow roots in your belly and create a temporary home!

    ICLW

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  18. KOctober 23, 2009 at 9:23 AM

    I am glad that your number doubled and I kmfc that this is a sticky bean. I hope that your spotting stops soon. Blessings and hugs!

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  19. AnonymousOctober 23, 2009 at 5:52 PM

    Good news about the number doubling. Bad about the spotting, though some people spot throughout the pregnancy with no problems. Wishing you luck.

    /Love/ that photo.

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  20. Mrs. GamgeeOctober 23, 2009 at 9:42 PM

    Doesn't it suck that having a good beta result can't overpower those feelings of 'for now'? Sending prayers and good thoughts!

    ICLW

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  21. KelliOctober 24, 2009 at 3:50 PM

    Praying that that precious baby stays with you and that you have a happy, healthy and blessedly normal nine months. :)

    *ICLW*

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  22. ericaOctober 26, 2009 at 2:06 PM

    thanks again for sending that not rational link! it looks like i'll be able to buy a hansel diaper bag, yay!

    i hope that everything is on track for a healthy and uneventful pregnancy.

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  23. AliceOctober 27, 2009 at 12:12 AM

    Congratulations! That is wonderful news and I hope the spotting goes bye-bye! Also, you have a beautiful blog - very fun and touching to look at and read. Wishing you a healthy & happy pregnancy. xoxo,

    ICLW

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  24. AnonymousOctober 27, 2009 at 6:29 AM

    I'm so glad you've gotten some good news. The only advice I have is to enjoy your pregnancy. Whether it lasts 9 months or 9 weeks, enjoy it! While it may be tempting to think the mouse "jinxed" it, know that the only thing you can do is focus on growing that baby! Good luck!

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